As a woman who’s decidedly more ragamuffin than runway, I often struggle with how I look and the face I want to present to the world. I change my wardrobe more often than most people: I’m constantly rotating pieces in and out of my closet as I get tired of them or get excited about something new. Sometimes this is because I legitimately love clothes and have attention issues when it comes to liking my clothing for too long. Other times, and probably far more frequently than I’d like to admit, it’s me trying to distract myself from the fact that I, like so many other women, have body issues and don’t like what I see in the mirror. Shaving my head a few months ago was mostly curiosity, part philanthropy, and, if I’m being honest with myself, another expression of my dissatisfaction with my body.
The last time I had professional photos taken of just me was for my high school senior portraits, and that was in 1999 (unless you count the super fun photo book project that I was in for a friend in Boise in 2010, which was a total blast!) Back in high school I weighed roughly 100 pounds more than I do now: I remember seeing the photos and just feeling sad. Sad that that’s what I really did look like; sad that no matter what I accomplished, I felt like I would always just be The Fat Girl. As the years after high school passed and I lost more and more weight, I don’t ever remember feeling super thrilled about what I looked like in those photos either. It’s true that we’re our own worst critic, and I’ve gone through many ups and downs in terms of weight and body image in the past 15 years.
I’d wanted to have more up-to-date photos taken of me for awhile, and meeting Chelsea at Texas Style Council pretty much sealed the deal. I can’t say enough good things about this gal, and her work is absolutely stunning. I’d thought about what I’d wear for a photo session and decided on three looks that make me feel comfortable and/or good about myself. The day of the shoot, I tried my best to put my body issues aside for our session and just have fun with it, and Chelsea certainly helped in that regard. I’m about 10-15 pounds heavier now than I wish I were, and this was a particularly humid morning (we were literally wiping beads of sweat off ourselves in between shots; it was a less-than-glam situation, to say the least) but I had a blast and am so happy with the result. Here, a few of the photos from our session last week that I like…
Thanks again to Chelsea for the photos and for indulging my silliness for well over an hour. I’m thrilled at the result, and she definitely helped me put my best face forward for the shoot. If you’re in the Austin area, I cannot recommend this woman enough for her photography: she’s been in Austin for only 6 months, and Tribeza is already beating down her door to work for them!
What makes you feel better about your body and the way you look? Is it an outfit? A person? A movie, maybe? Please share it!